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Talk:Margaret Cavendish

From Women in European History

Peer review - Frank Cheng

The thesis is clear, but I would like some more background if it is possible. The culture of philosophy at the time is a big mystery to me; it might be interesting to compare traditional philosophical routes to the one Cavendish took. The main link to importance is the claim that outside influences is the driving force behind Cavendish’s drive. It is clear from the opening paragraph that the paper will explain how this is the case.

The standard chronological order was used. I might suggest some kind of ordering into groups of external forces that shaped her life, as sometimes I lost the train of thought; however doing so would pose other problems, like not being able to see Cavendish’s formation the way she experienced it.

All the analysis performed pertained to the thesis. One thing I would suggest is making clear which external force is being analyzed; this is simply for the convenience of a reader. The writing style is very smooth and enjoyable. I found myself agreeing with the author more often than not.

I did lose sight of the thesis at certain points, but I felt that enough information was given at all times to keep me engaged in trying to form my own opinions. The biography form is simply too broad to allow for carefully crafted logical arguments; one is constrained by word limit and the tremendous amount of events that occur during a lifetime. I think the point is to give information concisely and pointedly, which was achieved.

Overall, this was very fun to read, and I thank you for your work.

Peer Review - Hannah

Thesis

1. There is an identifiable thesis. The thesis about Margaret Cavendish yearning for literary immortality is sufficient to bring out the fact that she was an anomaly in the literary circle, as well as her society.

2. Yes. The thesis covers the questions on how Cavendish stood out as a woman writer.

3. The thesis mentioned why she had thoughts of obtaining literary immortality. It'd be even better if the introduction also talked about how she achieved it, or what kind of consequences she met in the process of earning her fame.

Organization

4. Yes, the organization is very clear. You can keep it this way!

5. Yes, it is very logical and clear. It is organized in a chronological way, which helped a lot in reconstructing how Cavendish came to have the thoughts of becoming literary immortal, and how she achieved it.

6. Yes, I think so. The essay built up the story of her life and the thesis step by step, making it very easy to follow.

Citations and Evidence

7. Yes, the sources are cited appropriately. I didn't find any significant error in formatting.

8. Yes, most of the evidences are relevant. I think they contributed most helpfully in explaining the backgrounds of Cavendish's life, and supporting claims.

Grammar and Style

9. It's okay. No big problems!

10. Yes, most of the time. Sometimes there are difficult and long sentences. It'd be better if you break the ideas up, or put the complicated ideas in a more direct way. Please see the wiki.

11. There are topic sentences, although they don't really sum up the central idea of the paragraph/section. I personally think the topic sentences are okay for a biography... but maybe you can still try to modify them a bit - link each topic sentence closer to the point you want to make in each paragraph.

Content

12. Yes.

13. I think the paper is good in the sense that you showed some thoughts about Cavendish's life without straying away from the method of biography! It'd be even better if you can elaborate some more about how the idea of literary immortality impacted her.

Specific Suggestions

1. Just a little bit more elaborations on each of the points you made.

2. There are some complicated sentences occasionally. Break them up maybe?

3. Work on the topic sentences too! Try to bring out the point you want to make.

The author did really well in the format of the paper. It really sounds like a well-researched biography! I can also see the thoughts she has on Cavendish. I enjoyed reading this essay a lot!

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This page has been accessed 3,949 times. This page was last modified on 19 May 2010, at 09:01.


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